Life has those moments
Which can be years
Or even lifetimes
When the stress piles up
And inspiration is a shadow puppet of your former self
In a dilapidated wall burning down
It’s like you’re being attacked by a street gang called worry half the time
And the other gang in the neighborhood
The competing faction
Called regret
You reach for things that make your life smaller
That turn the whole thing into pinprick of addiction
Fear is always at the root of addiction
Iboga ceremonies will teach you that
Strange shamans will come into your visions with instructions on how to overcome the evils of this world
Which amount to your own limitations
Your own fears and regrets and worries
Leading you to behaviors
That whittle your life down
To mood altering action
Essentially your life gets leveled into chasing a dwindling buzz
That’s addiction for you
It becomes small
Even if you’re living it across the covers of forgotten magazines
Rolled up twenties sniffing powder off a mirrors in strange rooms you’ve never been in before
You ask yourself feeling the drip
How’d I get here again
The sun coming up on an evening chasing a buzz
Making life small
Something you can fit in your pocket on your way home
If you still have one of those
With the revelation that you’re gonna turn it all around
One more time
Again.
Alternatively
Life has those moments
Which can be years
Which can be lifetimes
Where you make your life big getting bigger
Going for runs over the brooklyn bridge at night
To see the electric skyline
And think of the possibilities
Like the birds flying around the crown of lady liberty
Your thoughts transcending the small things
The fearful things
Your good habits and oxygen
Allowing you to transcend past limitations
The dreams doing exciting jumping jacks
Praise to Jesus not far from your tongue
You’re running to a meeting now
Where you aim to share your light
And help another find theirs
Those moments
Where you’re the full expression of who you were meant to be
Victorious over addiction
Excited as a kid with a cool outfit on the first day of school
Riding the possibilities like surfer riding waves of freedom
Everything is in front of you
And regret is a poodle or lapdog
A symbol of things you could have done different but nothing preventing you from doing different from this point going forward
Un afraid to be original
Un afraid to be who you are
I was there last night running over the brooklyn bridge
It’s a run I’ve done countless time
That bridge and the Manhattan bridge
Up and down the east river
And the west side highway
Ten mile runs
13 mile runs
6 and 7
Long ones where you slip into a meditation
Into deep breathing
A kind of healing in motion
Hooking a funnel from the sky into your head
The vortex of inspiration
Before I ran I talked to my mom for a half hour or so
They are terrified of what the media tells them
My nephew who has the v
Was with his teacher who has the v
Im sure all of them triple v’d
And they are passing the c of the o variant back and forth
So now the folks aren’t coming for x mas
More examples of everyone getting this already having got that
But no ones allowed to question the illogic of it all without being called a conspiracy loon.
At a certain point you have to weigh your sacrifice
Fear the root of all addiction
The world is afraid now
Addicted to a news cycle
Addicted to division
Addicted to the idea
That half of society is selfish and bad
For asking questions
For spotting holes in logic
For not trusting their lives to notoriously corrupt institutions
It’s a shame because I don’t know how many chances my mom and dad will get to have a Christmas with their grand daughter
And what is life at those late stages
These moments you can’t recapture
Your mama and me both have already had the thing
Both have natural immunity which scientifically is the most robust (but speaking scientifically is often against the mainstream media propaganda narrative)
Plus we both feel healthy as can be and have no fear
But of the people’s inability to see past the narrative they are being fed
To control
To destroy
To condemn
To divide
To enslave
To revoke
Biden told us we are all in danger she said
I could hear the fear in her voice
In our world it’s the people who have gotten the thing which are spreading the thing
And yet they are being told that would be much worse if they didn’t get the thing
I said that’s a theory
Perhaps it’s true
But in my world it seems to be playing out the opposite of that
I asked her how she was feeling
She said she was good but that her memory was going
I told her about Warren zevon and enjoying every sandwich
I told her we should enjoy this
Having a great conversation while I walked over the brooklyn bridge the electric skyline twinkling in the soft focus of my aged eyes
I couldn’t help but be upset that fear was gonna prevent them from seeing their granddaughter
From misinformation and propaganda
Robbing themselves of holding the light that bursts from her smile and her eyes
What a shame.
What a damn shame
And for those of you who say it’s cause you don’t get the thing
Let me repeat (since I write in a poetic abstract voice about a subject you have to speak around because of censorship ) it’s people who have gotten the thing that are spreading the thing preventing them from coming.
Also let me say that I understand their fear
And to elderly in world wrapped in a nightmare narrative of 24:7
Focus on a horrible death means those golden years are far from golden
But rather grilled in new layers and levels of fear
Fear is of the devil
We walk by faith and not by sight
I said to her
Remember when dad would call it the idiot box?
She said yeah
I said well
He didn’t know how smart calling it that was
It’s ruining people’s lives
They’re funneled instructions
From the idiot box
They are told what to think and feel
And they fall in line like hypnotized monkeys
Two years in
Squashing the hope that holidays can usher in
Replacing it with more fear and isolation
And once again if you’re one of the ones brave enough to question it
Well good luck with that.
It’s a brutal road my friend
My mom and I got off the phone she told me how much she appreciated the pictures of Alessia
The facetimes
And the like
I resolved to do more of it
I told her if they wanted to stay in a hotel we would triple mask up and bring the grandkid
These moments are fleeting
She said they were too afraid to even goto a hotel
Biden says
Biden says
I said do you think Biden is only motivated out of the goodness of his own heart with what he says
Do you think there could possibly be any other agenda behind it?
She said welll…. And the conversation drifted
I said ok ok
I understand I love you.
It was great talking to her
I’m grateful for everything these days
Every moment
Nothing is guaranteed
And life has never been something with zero risk
You have to weigh
The quality of your life
The experience of your life
Against risk
Courage factors in
We aren’t meant to be isolated in padded cells hooked up to the metaverse
Terrified of sharing air
There other factors and metrics around health
We got off the phone
And I started running
Breathing deep and listening to new mixes
Of my new album
A song called Rise
One of my best
We can see over but can we can see past
We can see forever but can we make it last
We can go under but we can be brave
Holding our hearts up
Trying to find someone to save
Rise when you hear the cries and then you make the scene
Run through the hemispheres and learn to live your dream
I thought to myself
I’ll be leaving New York soon
The whole 25 plus years I’ve been here
Might as well have been a long day
Or multiple lifetimes
Life moves in every direction of time
And it’s it gone in an instant
Gone in a zap
But it’s also eternal and goes on forever
But running over the bridge
With my song blasting
Thinking about my whole New York life
Locked in addiction at points
Being an inspired athlete at other points
I though wow I’m gonna leave victorious
Addicted to nothing
Sober and inspired
Working on mixes to an album that sounds as good as or better than anything else I made
Totally inspired
Totally alive
In love with you and your mama
And what life is becoming as we become a family
Dedicated to bringing light and joy to world fractured under a message of constant fear
Coming from an idiot box.